I was trapped. Confined to a dark, desolate room. I looked around, for the smallest bit of light that would provide me with warmth. But there was none to be found. The smooth walls enclosed me in a way where I found it hard to breathe. There was no sound. All I heard was my slow breaths as I tried to process what was happening. I felt claustrophobic. Around me was this empty and unsettling darkness that swallowed me. As my eyes adjusted to the darkness, I could barely make out a small crack in the corner of the wall. I was so confused. Where am I? How did I get here? What had happened? My mind remained as empty and dark as the room. Last I remembered, I was walking my dog, Charlie. The two of us went on an evening stroll to clear my thoughts. I remembered that I was arguing with my parents, about something…I can’t remember what. But afterward, I had taken Charlie to get away from my parents for a bit. Wait where were my parents? Where was Charlie? Anger and confusion welled inside of me as I started pounding on the beige walls for help. My screams echoed in the room and my heart thumped loudly. My pounding became harder and harder and my head whirled as everything was a blur. And then, I blacked out.
When I woke up, I noticed a rush of doctors around me. Somehow I was on a hospital bed with giant monitors around me. I could hear the murmur of doctors as they were keeping note of all my vitals. I was in the same room, but now, the room was flooded with light and warmth. I reached out to feel the warmth on my hands just to have a doctor instruct me to keep my hands by my side. I was still thankful, however, to be out of my prior situation. But I was still confused. I questioned the doctors, but nobody answered. I grew frustrated. Again, how did I get here? Why were there so many doctors surrounding me? Where were my parents? And most importantly, where was I? Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I saw my parents. I’d been so worried earlier, thank goodness! But, my mom was crying. Tears streamed down her cheeks, smudging her makeup. Her usually neat bun was a mess as her hair stuck up. My dad, on the other hand, looked tired and messy. He looked like he had just gotten off a plane with jet lag. I was still overjoyed to see them because I needed answers. Now. I jumped off of my hospital bed and pushed through the sea of doctors, all urging me to sit down. But I didn’t care. I needed to talk to my parents.
I looked at them with a furrowed expression.
“I need some answers,” I demanded. My parents glanced at each other, worried, and then explained.
“Honey,” Mom started, “you’ve been admitted into a mental facility.”
What? Why?
“We’ve noticed that you have been acting differently for the past few months. You have been quiet, shutting people out, and keeping secrets from us,” said Dad.
“What? How have I been doing that?” I questioned, defensively.
“Katherine, we have been worried about you for a long time. We’ve seen the things that you have been doing. They are all caught on camera,” explained Dad. “The main reason why we admitted you is because of the violent behavior that you are expressing. Like when you killed Charlie.”
I was confused and shocked. I hadn’t killed Charlie. In fact, I recalled taking him for a walk.
“You’re lying! I did not kill Charlie!” I cried in shock.
“Yes, Katherine, you did. We have everything caught on camera, so don’t think about lying to us,” said Mom sternly. But, I did no such thing. I loved Charlie with all my heart. He was my best friend and my most loyal companion. Mom saw my face filled with disbelief. She grew angry and piped up to my dad. “Show her the video, Hayden.” My dad nodded and pulled out his small cellphone. On the cellphone, flashed a video. It was me and Charlie. We both were walking, just like I had remembered. A fresh line of evergreens surrounded us and flowers peeked out from the cracks in the sidewalk. I remember enjoying that walk with Charlie as we admired the nature around us. But, as I looked at the video closely, I saw my face fill with rage. In the video, I had pulled out a small cutting knife. A knife that would be used in the kitchen. With a menacing look on my face, I pointed the knife to Charlie, slowly moving it closer and closer to him as he yelped. I was torturing my dog! With a swift motion, I stabbed my best friend without a look of grief or remorse. It was like watching an evil stranger perform this action, even though it was me. Tears trickled down my face. I couldn’t watch it anymore. As I turned around, I heard the cries of Charlie echoing in the hallway. I looked at the video with horror. I would never do anything like that! In fact, I didn’t even remember doing that! My head was spinning, and I felt so much pain. I collapsed to the ground, sobbing while cradling my knees.
“Charlie! Charlie!” I cried.
“The security cameras caught that. This is why we admitted you to this facility. The doctors are going to run tests on you to find out why you did that,” explained Dad. His eyes were bright red and veiny. Clearly, it had pained him to see me cry over Charlie. But I was still incredibly confused and angry. I was angry at my parents for leaving me to suffer in the enclosed room. I was angry at the doctors who didn’t seem to care about my questions and what I was going through. But most of all, I was angry at myself for not remembering this horrible incident and for hurting Charlie. I cried into my parents' shoulders, reminiscing about my dear Charlie. A wave of emotions swept through me, and I felt so overwhelmed and tired. I didn’t know why I had done what I did to Charlie, and why I felt so many different emotions. However, all I knew was that something was seriously wrong with me.
